Beyond Words

I’m so exhausted. Tadi jalan2 kat area Jalan TAR n Jalan Masjid India, shopping dengan sarah siti ida n faezah. Sangat best n menarik. Maybe sebab dah lame x pegi area tu n dah lame x shopping dgn kawan2 kot. Oh and by the way, tadi jumpa Mak n adik2 Nafidz kat klcc!! Lama gile x jumpe. Nad, nel, shasha sume dah besar! Aunty la yang tegur dulu, x sangka diorang igt aku lagi. Terharu jugak la. Huhu.. Nafidz is my old friend since I was in Tadika Maria which was like 16years ago? And dulu aku penah ade affair dgn die mase darjah dua. Hakhak.. Tapi budak2 mmg la xtau pape kan. Huhu.. Tapi x sempat jumpe Nafidz, uncle, naqib n nabil. Mesti diorang dah besar. Seronok la jumpa diorang. Tak tahu pesal tp rindu jugak ar kenangan2 masa kanak2 ribena. Happy sangat jumpa diorang :)

Talking about feeling happy, I've finally found this one professional photographer conducting a photography class for beginners, Mr. Andy Lim. Aku bercita2 besar utk beli DSLR. My olympus sp350 akan dibuat hak milik bersama kat rumah so that icah n anid bleh la slalu gadoh nak gune camera. Hah hah.. And insyaAllah kalau dimurahkan rezeki nak pergi kelas Encik Andy. Aku pun x tau rm200 per session is expensive or not. The nearest session is sometime in april and one of the dates is 7th. Mule2 dah excited tapi lupe pulak ade ESQ training masa tu. InsyaAllah aku nak jadik ATS, kalau diberi peluang. Doakan aku berjaya merasai erti hidup pada memberi :) So, maybe aku akan pegi photograhy class after final exam kot. Ada cuti lebih kurang 3 bulan, bleh ar aku lepas gian. Huhu.. Tapi aku mungkin akan tanya pendapat para2 professional spt Nadya n the geng and encik nizam. Kalau diorang kata not worth it, mungkin aku akan suruh diorang je yg ajar. Hmm.. *menarik*. Oh and lagi satu berita kelakar, aku baru sign up friendster tanpa apa2 tujuan yang jelas. Mungkin aku akan delete balik account tu selepas kebosanan melanda.

Anyway, I’m not really in the mood to blog actually. But I wanted to share this lyric taken from the song ‘Beyond Words’ by Outlandish. Yes, I’m currently fascinating outlandish. Once you've listened to their songs, you won’t have time for others. And the lyrics are very inspiring. This coming april [which is on my birthday, 9th April], there will be an 'Evening of Inspiration' in The Royal Albert Hall. Outlandish and the geng [Zain Bikha, Dawud Wharnsby etc] will be performing. The ticket price range is from 18-22pounds. Kalau boleh spend duit untuk pergi holiday peri Germany and Europe, takkan tak mampu nak beli ticket ni kan? Mungkin encik avatarbroadband dan juga hamba Allah from Westfield College, London boleh consider utk pergi. Pastu boleh share dengan orang yg tak dpt pergi spt aku :) Anyway, hope we get something good out of it.

With my right foot first, I stepped into the holy mosque, Upon the cold white marble, Where day and night people sat worshippin’, praying, Right and left the mosque being cleaned, Shinin’ not a particle of dust, The carvings of marble, the plates of gold, The symmetry of the whole mosque, Yeah the largest of it all, The came the grandest of the whole, The big beautiful house of Allah, Covered with black cloth and gold leaf writin’, My life flashed passed me, the good and the bad, Such a feeling my brother, never ever felt I had, A special bondage to the almighty, A sudden chill in me, Lookin’ around the large floor was filled with unity, Circling the beautiful house, Chanting, people sitting, prayin’ for forgiveness, Prayin’ to do better I witnessed, Takin’ a deep breath, tears was runnin’, I ran around the black house, the ancient black house, Built by Ibrahim, peace be upon him, circlin’ 24 no doubt, I got closer, as did my heart, as did my soul, amazing, How everyone had their attention only on worshippin’, All concerns forgotten, focused on prayin’, Forgettin’ everything matters and happenings just giving, I looked up in the sky thanking Allah for this journey, Sayin’: I swear I didn’t schedule to be here this early, I thought I’d come here like pops in my forties and fifties, And the doe I paid for the ticket, was meant for some hobby, But who am I to say if I will be alive tomorrow, Or 20 years from now, will my health be able to follow, For a moment I pictured my self 6 feet deep, In the cemetery, my corps in the same white sheets, Allah holds the master plan and it’s already written, The pens are withdrawn, the pages are dry... it’s written!

Looking back on my life
Life that’s gladly been given to me
Open my eyes and embrace the smile
Given to you & I

Con mi mano derecha abro la puerta
Mi madre me recibe con un periódico y una carta
Veo fotos de mi padre abatido por disparos
De momentos ya yo espero
Que mis lágrimas caigan, me preparo
Me sorprende que mis ojos estén secos y mi alma esté calmada
En mi cuerpo no hay dolor por una persona ya olvidada

Translation:
[With my right hand I open the door
My mom welcomes me with a newspaper and a letter
I see pictures of my father fetched down by shots
In that moment I’m only waiting
For my tears to fall, I’m prepared
But to my surprise my eyes are dry and my soul is calm
In my whole body there’s no sign of grief for a forgotten person]

Staring outside, there was something I realized
Tomorrow the sun will rise, and together
Will see the beauty of eternity

Salgo a caminar y despejar mis pensamientos
Lo normal sería sufrimiento
O un parecido sentimiento
Le pido a Dios que lo amparé en sus últimos momentos

Translation:
[I go out, take a walk and clear my thoughts
The anticipated feeling would be suffering or something similar
I ask God to be merciful in the final hours]

Looking back on my life
No regret only the sweet journey
Lessons from the simple steps
Taking by you & I

With my right hand first, I open the door to the room where my woman gave birth, To my first born son, Only minutes before, I was in the waiting room, nervous, Moms giving me comfort, Family support, As I approached I could hear him crying, I didn’t notice, That my tears were running, Pictured myself for a moment in the arms of my father, Flashback to the bended shoulders, On which I’d sit, Grabbing his finger, Taking my first step, Would I become like him?, After a certain age bottle up, Stop showing love, But cold handshakes throughout the years, Replaced by hugs, Father whispered in his ears, The family was gathered, Pictures were taken, My hands still shaking, My joy was beyond words, Him in my arms, 3 generations of tears running so calm, He came with Gods blessing and grace so we named him Faizan.

If I worship YOU in fear of hell, burn me in it
And if I worship YOU in hope of paradise, exclude me from it
But if I worship YOU for YOUR own being
Don’t withhold from me YOUR everlasting beauty

Wallahu’alam