Running away from the reality has never been the answer to solve the problem. It has been for a few days since I last posted my previous rubbish entries. I was offline almost all the time except when I was skyping with my family. No, it's not because I'm 'puluning' and studying all the time for the exams. That's a big NO. I was basically shunning myself from those unexpected things. Don't worry, you no need to understand what I'm shitting right now. But basically, I did not sit and lay back and thinking about the past. I did not staring outside the window and wishing him well. I did have a weird dream last night but I didn't think about it. I treated the dream as a mere game of thought. I thought I was being coward and the only thing to do was running away. But the thing is, all those running-aways and whatever I did helped me a lot. It was a good solution. So theoretically, I was and am not running away. I am just moving on.
Days go by. Sometimes I feel so scared to move on. The only thing that I loathe so much is when I need and have to think about my future. But yea, I have 'tawakkaltu 'AlaAllaah' to help me out with that. But sometimes, just sometimes it doesn't always come that easy. Nad just got her offer to do medicine in KMB. Icah is now in Terengganu, studying hard for her exams. Lupi is sitting for his exams to. Along Ima just had her second exam today. I'm going to have mine in a few weeks' time. And in few months' time, Mum and Dad will be all alone at home. Isn't that scary? Mum and dad's children are all grown up. I'm going to get my first year of medicine over shortly. And needless to say that he's having his thing in a few weeks' time as well but that's another matter. What I'm trying to say is, time has been catching up on me so fast!
And not just that. I have other plenty of sheeeeeets of paper to deal with. I am an emotional person. Sometimes it's so hard to handle it. Sometimes, it's not difficult at all..but it's just unbearable. It's an ujian. And I am no way running away from it. But what the heck. I have HIM. He's preparing me for being a person with the better. And I should not be complaining. At all.
Days go by. Sometimes I feel so scared to move on. The only thing that I loathe so much is when I need and have to think about my future. But yea, I have 'tawakkaltu 'AlaAllaah' to help me out with that. But sometimes, just sometimes it doesn't always come that easy. Nad just got her offer to do medicine in KMB. Icah is now in Terengganu, studying hard for her exams. Lupi is sitting for his exams to. Along Ima just had her second exam today. I'm going to have mine in a few weeks' time. And in few months' time, Mum and Dad will be all alone at home. Isn't that scary? Mum and dad's children are all grown up. I'm going to get my first year of medicine over shortly. And needless to say that he's having his thing in a few weeks' time as well but that's another matter. What I'm trying to say is, time has been catching up on me so fast!
And not just that. I have other plenty of sheeeeeets of paper to deal with. I am an emotional person. Sometimes it's so hard to handle it. Sometimes, it's not difficult at all..but it's just unbearable. It's an ujian. And I am no way running away from it. But what the heck. I have HIM. He's preparing me for being a person with the better. And I should not be complaining. At all.
photo taken by Yusree.And I have been missing photography for a while :(
p/s: This entry shows clearly that I'm not a pathos. But I don't know why, I'm still doing the countdown. Yes, I ain't a pathos but I am pathetic. You just knew me too well, H. Huhuhaha.. 18 days to go! Geez.. I really don't know what to expect! Excited!
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