Sunday, December 02, 2007

Of missing my bro.. Sob2..

  • The moment at the airport when I was about to depart to Langkawi, Lupi hugged me and said “I love you dina. I know you will make Mum and Dad proud”.

  • During his SPM results announcement day, my mind did not seem to focus on my studies for the whole day. I skipped my lunch after class and ran straight to my room and quickly grabbed my phone and called Dad. And when Dad said “Alhamdulillah nak, Lupi dpt straight A1”, I could not stop myself from sobbing. I cried and cried, and missed him very much. I sms-ed him immediately “Lupi, congrats for the excellent result. I’m very happy for you” and he replied “Thanx na, sayang kau..”

  • Time flies. When I got the offer to go to KYU3M, he told me to use the opportunity as best as I could. “Aku dulu teringin sangat nak pergi sana, tapi dapat KMB nak wat camne. Tapi aku happy ah ko dpt pegi lembah bringin”.

  • “I just want you to do well. And I want you to be better.”
Yesterday, when I saw him from afar, I beamed with delight, explaining how happy I was to see him. Not that we haven’t met for years or anything but knowing that even I’m here, being away from family in Malaysia, I still have Lupi to look after me. He looked good, as usual. I had so many things in head to tell him but since Lupi and I were playing for football n netball respectively, we didn’t have so much time to catch up on each other. Let alone the football field was quite far from the netball court.

My game yesterday was not that bad though there were some dissatisfaction made by the host but we played very well. Out of 5 games, we only won one game and supposedly drew 3 games [tapi referee tu mcm bengong sket kata kitorg kalah satu game] and lost to n0tt$ in one game. So we didn’t manage to go to the next level. It’s been like that for Leicester ever since so no biggy. Heh.. So after I was done with my game, I took a bus to go to P0w3r Le@gu3 to see Lupi’s game pulak.

Because his team was doing very well, they got to play in several matches. By the time I got to the field, his team was playing against W@rwick. Since they won that match, they were qualified to enter the semi-final. It was almost 330pm and my bus to Leicester was at 5.00 so I had to rush back before I got left by the bus. I knew I wouldn’t be able to lepak2 with him so I said to him I have to go.

“Ko nak balik dah? Sedihnyaaa. Kata nak chill2..”
“Bas pkl 5 laa. Takut tak sempat..”
“Alaa awalnyaa..”
“Takpela, lenkali boleh chill2 lagi. Pi datang la Leicester..”
“Aku maybe x sempat nak datang Leicester kot na. Lepas habis game semua ni aku terus balik London. Esok balik cork trus. Aku ada exam x lama lagi..”
“Ok takpe. Nanti jumpa la kat cork dgn Mum anid n icah..”
“Ok, ko belajar elok2..”

I salam-ed his hand. And he hugged me and stroked my head.

“Ko jaga diri baik2 k.”

All this while, we rarely spent time together, you know, brother-sister relationship. He prefers to talk to @nid rather than me about just anything. They play badminton together, he teaches @nid how to play guitar, and he tells @nid about his girlfriend. Well, I don’t really mind because I know @nid does the job better than me and I’m used to it. Even I myself tell @nid stuff and not him. But since God-knows-when, things have somehow changed. I’m not complaining but as I’ve said before, it makes me feel somewhat different. And it’s something good to be felt.

I’ve never believed in horoscopes or those Chinese beliefs about date of births or anything but I somehow can tell that there are actually some similarities between me n Lupi. Yep, we were born on the same date and we’ve been celebrating our birthday together e.v.e.r.y.s.i.n.g.l.e.y.e.a.r and we even look quite alike [masa n0tt$ game, kak f@tin tanye kak @m@ni, ‘eh siapa budak lelaki tu? Muka dia sebijik mcm dina’ sambil menunjuk ke arah lupi. Huhu..], we both are very egoistic [mum kata Lupi ckp aku x penah nak call dia kat skype. Pastu mum suruh aku call Lupi sekali sekala. Aku mcm tertanya2, kenapa aku yg kena call dia n bukan dia yg call aku? And until now, we never speak to each other via skype. Kuangkuang..], we both are very sensitive inside [Lupi actually is a very soft-hearted person. He was the first to cry at the airport before anybody else during his departure to C0rk two years ago. At least I wept after Mum did!! Hehe..] and so many other things but we’ve never seemed to be close. We've never had good memories together. Perhaps words are not always necessary in our relationship because we both just know what is there.

Now, I’m missing him already. And I’m very disappointed for not having the time to chat n chill2 with him :( What even makes me feel worse is, Mum is now in Sydney, having a seminar and she’ll be back on the 7th. Tak boleh nak skype2 lagi for the time being. Sob2.. And as a result of that, I’m in no mood to do anything. Sigh..

This is just a random shot of Qu33n M@ry football team. Good looking jugak mamat tengah2 ni. Hah hah hah..

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

tau x..i jeles gler ngan u n aishah sebab abg korg mcm best gler..huhuhuhu..i xde abg pon..i cumer ada abg2 yg sama umur ngan i je(budak2 coll *sigh*)...diorg pon act lagi muda,tapi slalu jaga i mcm adik diorg...nyways,i nak abang jugak..!! tetiba i rindu kat adam,cha,cipoh sume....dah xleh nak manja manja lagi dah :(

deynarashid said...

alaa mar, jgn la begitu. abg i pon baru skrg je best. hahahahaha.. jahatnye! xdela, susah jugak ade abg senornye. sbb i ni possessive. so it takes me a long time to accept diorg punye girlfriend. eheh.. which is not something easy to handle actually. hmmm..