The Blue Sky

I’m done with my chem. paper 4. I was told last night that the only topic that was going to be in was organic but it turned out to be equilibria for the first question. Several minutes before I walked off to the hall, I had this strong feeling that equilibria would come out and yep, my instincts did a good job :) At least I got to revise something. And alhamdulillah, I think I answered it well though there were some tough ones. Well, it’s just an internal exam after all. No need to worry that much ;p

A friend of mine kind of blamed me for telling her that organic was the only topic to come out. She was quite pissed off because she didn’t really prepare for equilibria. Well, I came to think; were I to be blamed? Was it my fault? I mean, come on, she’s big enough to deal with this kind of situation isn’t she? Well, I hope she is. And let’s say if the paper only consisted of organic questions and I happened not to tell her about that, I’m sure she’s going to blame me too for not telling her. Sometimes, I do feel ticked off with all those smarty-pants especially when it comes to stuff like “I WANT TO GET AN A!! I CANNOT GET OTHER THAN A!! I DESERVE THE BEST”. Hellloooo???? Sape tanak dapat A? But do you really need to yell that around? That really winds me up. Sometimes I wonder if that is how an intelligent and brilliant student should act. Or perhaps it was only me who was too dumb to accept that kind of action.

But anyways, it’s already 24th Ramadhan. God knows how fast the time flies. I’m a bit frustrated though for not having the chance to fast and do tarawikh at home. I know this is not the first time fasting in college but this is the first time fasting a whole month in college. Well, approximately laa. By the time I get back home this Friday, it’s already the 28th day. I just can’t wait to go back home. And thinking about next year, this might be my last time fasting in Malaysia before the next several years. I’m gonna miss everything once I’m away :(

I couldn’t sleep last night. Thinking about someone. I wanted to send him a raya card but the postal service in college is quite bad so I don’t feel encouraged to send anyone a card. Apatah lagi nak mengepos duit raya ke clayton. Haha.. [don’t worry izy, you still have another 4 years there ;p I might save the best card and duit raye for the last year. Hehe..]. Everything conjured up images of him. It’s not actually him that all I cared about; it’s just something that I myself was not really sure. Haha.. I know it has been like 3 years now but I still couldn’t let everything go. And that is my biggest flaw; very hard to let things go and often be affecting and melancholic over inane things like this. He never understood how I treasured our friendship so much. All he always thought about is himself and never considered other people’s feelings. And at the end of the day, he always blamed other people for not being understanding. I’m not trying to bold out his weaknesses whatsoever. I just hope I could change him in a better way. But yea, perhaps N@dia is the best person for that. I pray she is. Talking about this, I sms-ed @|i+t yesterday in hoping he would reply but only to find out he’s changed the number. And I also found out that he’s deleted his friendster account as well. Ngehehe.. I’ve thought so. The only remaining fellows are Afar and F3r0z. Semoga berbahgie ye korang :) Sheesh.. how I miss the good old days..

Nevertheless, I received one special visitor today. What a small world la encik. Haha.. Well, I’ve been involving with this cyberworld since I was 12. And at that time, I often wasted my time in mIRC, one of the most famous chatrooms back then. And my favourite channel at that time was #e-kuiz. The bot [lebeyh kurang macam operator channel tu la] would give out questions to the chatter and we need to compete amongst ourselves to collect as many score as possible. I wasn’t sure what we are competing for [maybe just for the self-satisfaction] but it was fun. The funny part was, aku sanggup stay up or even bangun pukul 3-5 pagi just to collect score sebab mase tu kurang orang, orang tido so bleh conquer sorang2. Haha bengong. Tapi best ar. It was not that time-wasting actually. I gained quite a lot of new knowledge from that. And I still remember my rivals back then. Whenever they were around, I seldom got a chance to show off my skill. Hehe.. And one of them was encik karlbum. He was one of the sifus and I hardly got myself even 1 score when he logged in. Orang2 hebat yang lain adalah seperti vasco_abdussalam [who was coincidentally abg amir’s friend in Manchester], bro gIgGzMo a.k.a abg din, amer, airmood, ira_shakira [who was also abg amir’s friend in Bath. Kecik kan dunia? Oh, she was around during abg amir’s wedding. Tak sangka betul. Hehe..], kak ila, corduroy and ramai la!! Syok gile zaman2 kegemilangan dulu. Haha.. Kalau time puasa, balik2 tarawikh je mesti trus duk depan computer. Kadang2 tak pegi tarawikh pun sebab nak kumpul score. Bengong betul. Haha.. But it was really fun laa. I really miss those times :) And then, haritu, I was googling ‘photography class’ [at least I’m not googling people’s names. Heh.. Yeah, I’m thinking of going for a photography course this semester break but haven’t found any yet..] and kebetulan his blog was in the search list. Riang betul saya. Hehe.. What a small world indeed..

Now, I really miss everyone :( My friends, my teachers in Langkawi, Cheetham Hill and Daresbury Street people, e-kuizian peeps, the four blokes, my cousins and sedara mara, my brothers, and of course my family back home. Help me get out from here!!

I looked up at the sky,
Feeling the breeze brushing on my face,
Counting the clouds,
Painting our names,
Searching for the rainbow,
Singing along with the birds,
I could sense you beside,
I could see us together as one,
I could see your smile,
I could hear your laughter,
How I hoped the day would never come to an end,
But when the thunder clapped,
Everything was gone,
The bright light faded away,
It was just a pie in the sky..