Today somebody told me one big shocking news. Oh well.. I’m just speechless. Sedih ada. Kelakar pun ada. Sakit hati pun ade. Tapi redha je la, nak buat mcm mana.
R0y once asked me sometime ago, couples of years back, “Aku x dpt bayangkan mcm mana hidup aku kalau korang takde, ila takde, ajis takde, hilya takde, semua orang la. Mesti aku tak macam siapa aku sekarang.”
I don’t know why but I suddenly called what he said to mind and compare his words with what I'm feeling right now. Sometimes I try to put myself into another life with different set of people around, and imagine how happy or sad my life would be. But fantasy is of course deceiving and limiting. It’s not that I’m not thankful with what I have now. It’s just my mental need just to make sure that they are indeed not within the realms of possibility so that I would easily find my bearings in life. I don’t know. Like what Sya always told me, life is just full of pretence.
I’m trying to cope with what I have to bear now since my maths paper is in just two days’ time. And I’m REALLY counting the days for everything to be over. I just want to get out of here. Sometimes, I wish I were never in this place.
I’m glad there are still people out there who understand my situation. And I’m glad I’m not only attached to people in this college.
This Friday, there’s going to be a session of “Renungan ESQ” with P@k @ry at Hotel Istana. K0c@, n@j and me are planning to go but we’re still unsure with the transportation. Worse come to worse, I would ask Lupi to fetch me up right after my Stats paper. Nak temuntah dah duk kolej. Oh yep, Lupi is coming back this Friday. Flight dia sampai pagi kot so boleh la ambik aku petang tu. Huhu padan muke kene dera. Dulu aku dah slalu jadik driver die every weekend ambik-hantar masa kat KMB dulu. Hek!~
And I just uploaded new song. |2uz@ini send kat email. Huhu gumbire. Thanx a lot ruz! So, enjoy the song!~ If anybody wants the song, just let me know. I’ll email you right away :)
R0y once asked me sometime ago, couples of years back, “Aku x dpt bayangkan mcm mana hidup aku kalau korang takde, ila takde, ajis takde, hilya takde, semua orang la. Mesti aku tak macam siapa aku sekarang.”
I don’t know why but I suddenly called what he said to mind and compare his words with what I'm feeling right now. Sometimes I try to put myself into another life with different set of people around, and imagine how happy or sad my life would be. But fantasy is of course deceiving and limiting. It’s not that I’m not thankful with what I have now. It’s just my mental need just to make sure that they are indeed not within the realms of possibility so that I would easily find my bearings in life. I don’t know. Like what Sya always told me, life is just full of pretence.
I’m trying to cope with what I have to bear now since my maths paper is in just two days’ time. And I’m REALLY counting the days for everything to be over. I just want to get out of here. Sometimes, I wish I were never in this place.
I’m glad there are still people out there who understand my situation. And I’m glad I’m not only attached to people in this college.
This Friday, there’s going to be a session of “Renungan ESQ” with P@k @ry at Hotel Istana. K0c@, n@j and me are planning to go but we’re still unsure with the transportation. Worse come to worse, I would ask Lupi to fetch me up right after my Stats paper. Nak temuntah dah duk kolej. Oh yep, Lupi is coming back this Friday. Flight dia sampai pagi kot so boleh la ambik aku petang tu. Huhu padan muke kene dera. Dulu aku dah slalu jadik driver die every weekend ambik-hantar masa kat KMB dulu. Hek!~
And I just uploaded new song. |2uz@ini send kat email. Huhu gumbire. Thanx a lot ruz! So, enjoy the song!~ If anybody wants the song, just let me know. I’ll email you right away :)
2 comments:
remember what i told you. bertahan dina!! <-- favorite quote sape entah? :P
uhu uhu.. sadis! ye, akan kukenang kata2 mu!
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