Aimran called me last night and that was the third time in these straight three days. He's doing alright and that's the main purpose though, to tell me that everything is going well. I'm glad that he finally does something that he had wished for and that's cool. Now, I just need to wait and queue up maybe, to join him flying in the air not without wings, but with two metal wings instead. Aaaaw, it must be real fun! Hehe.. I'm honoured to be invited to his brother's wedding this July but since the ceremony will take place after my registration day in kyuem, so hopefully I'm able to go back home during that first weekend. If there's anyone to accompany me and a car to drive, I'll try to come.
Somehow, Aimran's call couldnt make my mood any better. I had somewhat a falling-out with someone and till right this second, those harsh words keep lingering in my head. I was really fumed and felt the rage boiled up within myself. But I tried to be as positive and cool as I could. Just imagine how hard you should take when the most precious relationship you have ever been in had finally come to an end. The person who once was the only thing you cared for and the only one that you would sacrifice ANYTHING for is now the furthest thing you could ever reach. Ok, that was quite a hiperbole because that's not what my matter is all about but the feelings cant go any different too much. Of course, guiltiness might get the control most of the time but what the heck, he'd chosen what he wants and I should just go on with my own life. It's now over. No need to recall any of those stupid things anymore.
So, in calming and getting myself better, I decided to clear up all those junks in my room. And what I found were these:
Somehow, Aimran's call couldnt make my mood any better. I had somewhat a falling-out with someone and till right this second, those harsh words keep lingering in my head. I was really fumed and felt the rage boiled up within myself. But I tried to be as positive and cool as I could. Just imagine how hard you should take when the most precious relationship you have ever been in had finally come to an end. The person who once was the only thing you cared for and the only one that you would sacrifice ANYTHING for is now the furthest thing you could ever reach. Ok, that was quite a hiperbole because that's not what my matter is all about but the feelings cant go any different too much. Of course, guiltiness might get the control most of the time but what the heck, he'd chosen what he wants and I should just go on with my own life. It's now over. No need to recall any of those stupid things anymore.
So, in calming and getting myself better, I decided to clear up all those junks in my room. And what I found were these:
My 'previous blogs' where I wrote almost everything in them. Everything in a sence of what I felt, thought of and anything regarding to my perception of thinking. You know, when you feel like you are the only person ever alive with a mind that no one could merely understand and people around you are going against what you do, nothing would make you feel any good but write down your thoughts into something that totally revolves your own world. And you might feel as souped up as you deserve to. Then you'll reach your self-satisfaction.
These are cards that I received from Along Ima, Angah Aya and Abang Amir during their study in UK. Full of encouragement and saccours that when I felt like a repellent dud and a total failure, they were what pulling me to stand up again. Even until now..
These are things that I've been locking up in my cupboard since I was a girl who knew nothing about 'appreciation' until now that I know how to isolate between those who appreciate people and those who are not. It's not that I want to be appreciated but it's just somewhat an inspiration. (Bla bla bla..)
Hurmm..this is supposed to be given to Hafiz tapi...something was wrong and I knew that he wouldnt even open it and read it on so, buat apa nak bagi. Buang lagi bagus..So, anyone who'll be turning 21 soon, just ring me a bell. It's unwritten by the way =p (Dun worry afar, I'll get you a brand new one. Hehe..And Roy, wait for this card tau! Haha..)
Hmm..the problem is, kemas bilik pun masih tak berjaya untuk membaiki mood ini. *pasrah* Ok la, need to feed my belly =) Hope it will make me slightly good. Have a nice day!
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